ultrasound .

Today marks 18 weeks and 3 days of being on my period.

And today I had an ultrasound.
It was probably one of the weirdest experiences of my life.
My mom picked me up at 3:15 and we drove to Kaiser's L.A. diagnostic imaging lab.
And then we waited for like, an hour, listening to all these pregnant teenagers.
There were so many.
And some of their friends, parents, or boyfriends were there, too.
The radiology lab waiting room was hopping, man.
If I didn't know any better, I would've thought we were at a rave exclusively for expectant mothers or something.
So then this MAN called us in and apparently, men are allowed to feel up pregnant women's bellies with their blue goo now with the disguise of "ultrasound technician".
(Or in my case, girls' who have had their periods for too long)
Anyway.
After six minutes or so of rubbing this slimy stuff on my stomach/lower abdomen area, the ultrasound technician proclaimed that my bladder was not very full.
I thought that was a joke. Like, he was looking at what I had for lunch today or something, and he meant to say there's nothing out of the ordinary.
So I was like, okay so I can go now?
And he was like, what? No, you need to drink this white nasty crap stuff so that your bladder will be full.
HUH.
Yeah, apparently, unless you're uber pregnant then you need to have a full bladder to have an ultrasound.
Like, when you're pregnant you're already pretty uh, round. Plus there's like, a couple of buckets of water in your womb already.
But when you're not pregnant, there's nothing to help pick up the magnetism or something..
Dude, I don't know.
I'm just the victim here.
Anyway, so he gave me some really icky stuff to drink and after 30 minutes (now it's about 5:40pm), I had to pee like a mofo.
I mean while everyone was watching the news on the televisions, or talking quietly amongst themselves, I was doing the pee dance.
You know the one.
Finally we were called again, so I went back into the little, super sanitary smelling room, like doubled over cause of the need-to-pee-pain.
But it paid off.
He confirmed that my bladder was indeed very full.
So then the guy got out his blue goo.
The first kind was warm so it wasn't too bad.
But then he needed a second kind and it was ICE COLD.
You know that song like, "there's an ice box where my heart used to be" or whatever?
There was like an ice box where my OVARIES used to be, dude.
They were shivering.
I swear I got temporary frostbite.
AND THEN, like, it was super awkward.
After he finished a good 25 minutes later, he got this cloth and started like, viciously rubbing my stomach to rid it of the blue goo.
I felt like I was getting tummy-raped, LOL.
But yeah.
He got some of that nastyfuck blue goo in my panties :[
I think I should take him to People's Court or something.
And sue him for like, 5 bucks so I can buy a new pair of undies.
Cause in this economy I can't go around paying for ultrasounds everyday, much less new underwear.
Good grief.

Anyway.
On the serious side, I'm a little concerned.
The ultrasound technician said my ovaries and uterus looked a little screwed up.
Well, he didn't say it like that.
He said my images looked a lot different than the norm.
But he said he would send them to the radiologist.
And then the radiologist and my doctor are supposed to have a meeting.
So I'm not sure when I'm getting the results.
I hope nothing's wrong, but at the same time, it's kind of expected that there is.
Like, what else could possibly be the explanation for all of this?
You know?
So I hope nothing's wrong, but at the same time I hope there is so that they can fix it.
Arighty.
Back to Mistss.
(: